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How often do you find yourself wondering if you've understood what someone's implied, said or expressed? Was there a hidden meaning or intention perhaps? Was there uncertainty about what they really meant? Did you feel confusion or maybe information was missing so you didn't get the whole picture?
On many occasions I've had to clarify what I've meant or have had to ask another to, because I didn't want to 'fill in the blanks'. There are so many different forms of communication that sometimes just getting clarity from the verbal form, is quite a feat. While I was teaching English as a second language, I sometimes felt like google search engine was in my head asking "Do you mean?..."
It was invaluable experience learning about other cultures.
Communication difficulties are common within families, between friends, in the workplace, in governments and within one's self. If someone is from a different background (that would be literally everyone!), or is from a different culture, religious beliefs and social structure, it can add complexities.
Just for good measure, let's also bring in the more subtle forms of communication; what is happening energetically. This opens up a whole other dimension.
These days with so much 'noise' through technology, it can be chaotic. With humanity's increasing energetic sensitivity, over-stimulation of senses and an extraordinary amount of communication from so many sources, it can cause overwhelm. This constant availability to cellphones, internet, social media and the like has a "charging" affect on people who are already energetically receptive. It can have both positive and negative affects so I feel it is even more important in our society to have a support structure for those waking up to their awareness and for those already on the path.
Effective communication involves many qualities;
Even when someone is not verbally communicating, they are still interacting. For example: exclusion is a form of communication where energy is being shut off or shut down (it is common for people to put up an energy barrier to feel safe or protect themselves). Open communication is a core element of intimacy. When I express myself in an honest open way, I also often feel vulnerable so I need to trust in order to do this.
It is said that to assume something is to make an "Ass out of You And Me". To me, assuming is much like filling in the blanks, which I find myself doing a lot when there is information missing. Indeed, much can get (very) lost in translation when I assume something. This can lead to making stories up in my mind and it can get out of control. It is always important to enquire or ask if one is not sure. When it comes to texting, emailing and the internet I have come across so many miscommunications, assumptions, judgments and so on. I love things like Skype as a traveler and ex-pat, to visually see family and friends across the world, yet, after a recent visit from family, there is nothing like in-person connection. All the subtleties that one misses can cause a lot of misunderstanding.
Some people withhold because they are afraid to talk for whatever reason. Fear is often linked to the throat chakra - communication, truth, expression, sound. In many cultures and societies people's voices are suppressed and oppressed.
Communication is also a two way (or more) interaction and most of it is energetic. When a person isn't being heard or acknowledged, this may cause them to feel dismissed, not valued, excluded and any number of feelings. When a person won't let go, won't open up, will not meet the other/s half way, then confusion, frustration and assumptions can begin to creep in. Verbal communication can work wonders to clarify what is happening for someone, even for mind-readers :)
My relationship with conscious community has offered a support system for me personally to emerge into the world, feeling empowered, heard and valued. I have observed, heard and seen that authentic connection is missing for a lot of folks out there. This connection is not limited to human beings; it extends to nature, animals and the cosmos. One can have this connection within the self, with one other, a group or feel it with all creation. Although I run my business via the internet and the phone I have strong boundaries and I know that it is unhealthy to be available 24/7. So I disconnect regularly with the material world and connect with nature, where I can simply be. I seek depth and what gives me this is being real with myself and my community.
Written by Laura Naomi
© 2018 Laura Naomi
Soulful Living Blog